4-10 Praying for a Husband or Wife

Praying for a husband or wife can be difficult, especially if the person does not know Jesus.

The tendency is to pray fervently for that person and to assume that we have the answers – that they are lost and we are found! To some extent we are correct, but not usually to the extent that we believe.

In most cases, the problem is not solely in the other person or in ourselves, it lies in the relationship. The relationship needs healing, being brought together and being built in the right direction – the direction that God will provide.

Trust is Lost

Between husbands and wives, relationships deteriorate. Spiritual walls are created which block communication and stop love and understanding. Instead of working together, we work against each other. One person fears what the other will say, or do, or how they will react. Trust is lost and the couple becomes sparring partners or worse.

We know God’s will in that relationship. He wants it healed and rejuvenated. He wants us joyous, supportive of each other and both loving and serving Him.

Our first step is to recognize our weakness and realize that we cannot do this on our own. We must lay our problem marriage at God’s feet, ask Him to take down the walls. We must pray for patience and for the ability to listen and understand the other partner’s point of view.

Gaining Understanding

Up till now, we’ve looked at things only from our own viewpoint. With God’s help, we can have a window into the other side. With understanding comes a more sympathetic viewpoint.

Now we can pray for things to do for the partner which will show love and understanding. Instead of emphasizing the negative by criticizing, we must look for the good and start praising.

Walls are created when we tear others down. They build the walls to protect themselves from being hurt. Praising them with a sincere heart and thanking them for the good things they do, tears down those walls. When we build people up, they like themselves better. They don’t need to spend as much time protecting themselves and their feelings. They like us better. We like them better. They do better. We praise more, etc., etc.

Instead of a negative, downward trend, we have created a positive upward trend.

Pray every day for that relationship. Ask God to guide you in what to say and do. It may take some time for your spouse to start believing that you are sincere. But keep at it and you will be amazed at the results.

Let’s pray.

Father God:

Marriage is Your ordinance.
You ordained it to glorify You and Your Kingdom.

I want my marriage to be restored and under Your Godly influence.
Help me to not to be critical but loving and supportive.
Change my attitude and my actions
to break down the walls between us.

Help me to love my spouse by treating them as
You love and treat me with forgiveness, kindness and patience.

I ask these things in Jesus’ name.



DLH – date unknown
Prayer added August 24, 2015